Today, I went for band practice! =D Jiaqi went home after about 30mins of sectionals! AND I'M ALL ALONE with seniors and people that I'm not THAT close with. But after today, I think actually, everyone's the same luh. We get along pretty well. Had my SYF "test" today, I hope I get in. But I doubt I'll get in. I played loads of wrong notes, and it's not very fluent.. But I did reach High E and F, which Mr Lee told me to try my best. I wasn't able to play it during sectionals on Wednesday, not even if I force. But hey, I did it today! :D And I even reached high F. I'm so proud of myself *claps*. Anyways, I HOPE I'LL PASS THE TEST. @_@ and I hope I don't get kick out of trumpet, cause Mr lee says that he'll MINIMIZE the trumpet section... means.. he'll be taking some of us out. :/ SIGH! stress STRESS.

Went to bukit panjang to find candis to pass her her stuffs. Took the LRT and I FELL ASLEEP ON THE LRT! ._. Omg, I'm such an ass. I fell asleep for about.. Idk, 45mins? ._. But luckily I was on the lrt and not the mrt luh :B 6 stations nia, chicken hair. :B Met Candis, passed her her stuffs and went home! ^^ slept awhile, prepared and head out to meet Venus. Went to had "dinner" and then we trained down to Bugis. Shopped for her CNY clothes, I bought 2 sets of clothes as well, and we bought the same hat :B. Too bad Jing wasn't able to come with us. HEH. But I think I buy hat = waste money. I don't think I'll ever wear a hat out? I'll try? Haha. ._.' anyways, shopped till 9pm and we took 960 to interchange, listened to music, talked and yadayada. Reached interchange @ 10.30pm +- . Went to mac to have supper because I was hungry T_T ! Then, we chatted about our childhood HAHA. I think it'll be kinda fun to post it here, but hmm.. NAH.  :D

3 more days to MALAYSIA AND $$ ~~~~~ ;D
4 more days to MY BIG DAY . <3


I'm actually kind of sad cause my friends can't celebrate my birthday with me ON THE ACTUAL DAY because I'll be in malaysia. ): !  SORRYYYYYYYYYYYY! T_T ANDDDDD I HOPE that my wish will come true. MUAHAHA.

Hi elephants! I LOVE ELEPHANTS :D. Anyways, I'm back in action! Seldom posting now because I have loads of homework to do, and also I have CCA on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Can you believe you omg? I have 4 CCA days in one week which is 7 days. Mad tired. Most of the time, CCA will end late because teacher's gonna talk to us, announcement etcetc and I'll only make it home by around 8pm? Bathe.. Dinner.. Homeworks. No time for facebook, twitter or etc! Omgggg I'm so busy.

Yay, I'm so glad that everything's over. Me and Jing's okay already, because I can't bear to leave her, aw?  But I think I was abit harsh on her? Okay la, Alot. But hey, I've been feeling like that, exactly the same feeling for the past 1year plus. Actually, I think now also not much difference. But sigh, it's okay. I'm used to it?

Aiya, since it's already the past, let's not bring it up! ^^ Went out on sunday with venus and jing. Was supposed to see the sunset together but the sky don't like us.. so the clouds covered the sky and we can't catch the sunset. But we saw many kites ^^ big small round flat, EVERYTHING! omggg, it's soo cool. Next time when I grow up and have kids, I shall bring my kids there to blow bubbles and fly kites! :D

It's REALLY windy that day and we took loads of pics. Very unglam because the wind was really strong and it blew our hair everywhere. :D It's been such a long time since I've feel the wind in MY FACE. aww

Home sweet home afterwards. Wow, I think singaporeans are really very singaporean HAHA.

KITES! (they're not birds! they're not DIRT on your screen. THEY'RE KITES!!) =D

And tadaaaa. Me and jing was laughing like mad when we saw the plate, and the kites HAHHAA.

School days are fun, nothing much. Attended every band sections! I'm such a good girl HAH. 

Had our band video taken today, we had to march and march and march and play. Gosssh, so tiring. Under hot sun somemore. But, I think it's kinda fun hees.

Having CIP tomorrow. gaaaaah. There goes my Friday. :/ sayonara peepos.

P/S. I won't be online as frequent as before! REASON'S ABOVE . I'm BUSY! ;D 

The clouds are really pretty here. I swear I didn't edit them ;D .

AND LASTLYYYYYYYY, unglam pics of JING HAHAHA,

YAAAAAAAY. Okay I shall be fair, since there's unglam, here's the nicer one. xD

OKAY, tata. ^^ 

Nothing hurts more than realizing she meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to her.

Guess I was too naive to believe that friends will last. Friends, come and go, right? So do bestfriends?
The world's such a scary place huh. I've changed, you changed, everybody changed. This is life. We get old. I've made a major decision. I'm gonna leave you. I'm not gonna be there for you anymore. So silly to think that if I stand by you, you'll stand by me too.  To think that If I help, you'll help. To cheer you when you're sad, you'll do the same. I guess I'm just a tool for you to use when you need it? The decision might do me good, or bad. Idk, but I've been so emotional for the past months because of you and your coldness. Let's see if leaving you, will work. I'm so sick of myself, feeling like that and unable to change. ._.

You don't have to ask weiting to tell me how much you've cried yesterday. I can guarantee that I've cried MORE than you, yesterday, previous days.

No more. I swear ._.

I guess, you're still you even if there's no Michelle by your side. You have your very dependable boyfriend, you don't need me anymore. Maybe, to you, I'm just a "friend" whom can entertain you when you're bored, cheer you up when you're sad, saying "Forget about him, he don't deserve you, there's so many other guys out there. Cheer up. Everything will be okay" , when you're ditched. A friend whom you can gossip with, a friend that you can call, when you're homeless and need a shelter, a friend that you can make use of, a friend that "blanja" you so you wouldn't have to fork out your own money...

I guess I'm really silly aren't I? To rush down and rescue you when you need help, to entertain you with my craps and to "blanja" you so that you wouldn't have to spend too much of your money that you've saved from work. To cheer you up, to gossip, to cry with and to laugh with?

I guess you just don't give a damn. What happened? Why the fish am I becoming so emotional? THIS IS NOT MICHELLE. I HATE THIS FEELING. You said, you feel left out when you're with me and venus, so, I kept on talking to you, venus did the same. I treated you like my sister. Giving you everything I could, not expecting anything in return. But don't you think it's a little bit too much?

After we got separated from primary school, we didn't contact as much as before. But we still worked together to spend time with each other, to continue our close relationship. After some time, I went into relationship with someone. The time spent with you lessen. Then came teck. You were so happy with him for some time, then, you slowly became emotional cause he's too flirty then soon after, you guys broke.

Was having breakfast with someone and his sis when you came to find me. You sat down there and just suddenly, you cried. I was so heartbroken. we tried to cheer you up, but we failed. Then me and venus went to find you when we're free. There you are, crying non-stop cause teck broke with you. I was almost crying with you.. but hey.. I had to cheer this broken heart-ed girl aye.. Did you know, after I went home, I cried because you're so heart broken? no? it's okay.

then soon, Weiting came. he had this dishonest and a rapist look that freaks me out. Then soon after, we started spending lesser time with each other... You became so cold towards me... 

you always put weiting as your first priority.. remember how we used to do stuffs together? no more. more and more awkward silence when we metup. you went for work and i had to go out with venus. After work, weiting would always go and fetch you. 

Then came this day, we, the 4 of us went to waterfront together until 11+pm . Went home and your parents locked you out of the house. you cried and called me. you intend to go venus' house to stay cause it's nearer. But you're scared that auntie would be angry at you. So, I suggest you to come to my house instead. I rushed down and met you at cwp. Your mum called me, and scolded me. She said that I AM BAD. Always make you late go home. 翅膀硬了. your mother was crying and crying. I had to LIE TO YOUR MOTHER that you're with your schoolmates to distress/ have fun, instead of just saying "OH YOU'RE CHILD HAS A BF." You know guilty I was? to lie to your mother?

afew weeks after you got locked out of house, on your way to my house. Your mum called me again. "You're a bad influence. Teach jing all the bad stuffs like staying out late. Always meeting you and spending money. BAD INFLUENCE, next time i see you two tgt, I call police." After her call, I just said "whatever la auntie." and I hung up.

you know how much I cried after hanging up the call? You know the words are really like knifes, stabbing into my heart? I cried and cried. Until you came. I bet you didn't notice that my eyes were red. You said to not mind her words. Try putting yourself in my shoes then. My mum called you up, and said YOU WERE A BAD INFLUENCE and wants you to fuck off from my life. how would you feel?

You came, I forgot what we did, and you went home. and I started crying again. pathetic huh? You don't even seem to notice my sadness. whenever you're "okay", I make sure you're okay. Whenever you need someone, I'm always here. And for this few months? Nov-jan?
Whenever I need you, Whenever I need someone to talk to, where were you? whenever I text you, no replies...

Remember how we used to laugh tgt, cry tgt, bully ppl tgt, have sleepovers, and being there fr each other every time? Remember how people was jealous of our close friendship? remember how people tried to BREAK us up but failed..?

Jing, I'm seriously sick and tired. I need a break. I'm sorry.

--
Venus came down to my house at 8.30pm. I know her well, her mum wouldn't let her out at this timing one. But she still made it. I was out, alone. Reflecting and crying. alone. offed my phone, and just sat down and cried. everything was so blurry.. it feels good to let everything out. I love the place. No people, no cars. nothing. Perfect spot for me. Went home, found a note on my door. was from venus. I was seriously touched. At least there's someone who's there for me... to rush down and comfort me when I'm down... then, venus appeared at my main door. freaked me out. we chat. we had a nice chat. then, we talked about you. Tears just roll down. I don't know why. I tried to laugh, but I end up looking like a sick crying chicken.
What makes you change so much, jing?

Thank you venus. I love you.
Thanks to all the people who tried to contact me via sms/call. Terrence kor, Venus, Zaid, Jeremy and hwoon.
I'm sorry If I did not reply your texts.
Thanks to anyone, who asked me to cheer up. facebook/ msn/ sms / call.



What a disgrace, Michelle... You just showed Venus your pathetic side. Worst still, you totally failed at controlling the emotions. laugh jiu laugh, cry jiu cry. whats this? Crying and laughing, and you failed miserably, and you end up crying again, and again. and again. 

Hi donkeys. Met up with Venus and Jing on Sunday, original plan was to go ECP to cycle but oh well, the weather's really bad I guess. D: We had to cancel our plans cause of the rain. So, we went to Venus' house and they continued watching "Piranhas" , I've already finished watching it HAHAHA, sad for them cause they had to go home @ 10pm that time and couldn't continue watching the movie with me HAHHAA. Crapped whole day, and had fun. ^^" Nothing much I guess. Went to school as normal on Monday and Tuesday. Was really high on Tuesday that I got irritated by myself gosh.

OH I forgot to mention that, YT's bf treated me and Jing to startbucks! MUAHAHA. :D Okay, that guy's a stranger to me. So, a stranger treated me starbucks. How awesome (: .

WAHAHA. :D

S9'2009. <3 I miss Mdm Rita. :/ I hope she's doing good now.

Okay, I freaked out just now. I got stalked by 4 guys from woodlands sec(I think?), wearing pe shirts. All the way to my lift lobby. ._.'' .. I don't know them, but they seem to know me? Bought packet food and bbt for lunch just now. They followed me all the way.. .-. god. Then, walked till my lobby, they still behind! -.-'' . Then I turned around and look at them. One of the guy, the only one without specs asked if I was Michelle. Answered, then I asked them how they know me and why they stalking me. They didn't answer me and just looked and smiled at me. ... Can't be bothered with them and took the stairs back to my house as I didn't want them to know what floor I live in. ._." Luckily, they didn't follow me anymore after that. Weird and scary stalkers..... sigh. Think maybe they nothing do then trying to find something to do. I'm so unlucky ._.' .
----

2nd week of school's alright I guess. Went for every band practice hohoho. Got caught by a teacher cause I fail attire. Skirt only 1 or 2 finger above knee, form teacher already say my skirt acceptable and pass le. Then the other teacher still go catch. Also catch my piercings zz. Put transparent she also can catch walao eh. She damn power can. ._.' Nvm. I've decided to close some of my piercings cause I want to start everything again and forget the past. I don't want to keep the memories anymore.

It's okay, I'm not mad at the teacher. It's partially.. nono, it's my fault. For forgetting to take out the earsticks aft school start. As for the skirt, I'll just have to be more careful next time not to let her catch haha. ._.' Luckily 2E2 sit behind, and not in front. Behind not so paiseh la, Only people from side see ma, in front cannot see. If stand in front, side people can see, behind can see also leh.

After school, went for band with Jiaqi straight, cause there's CCA orientation for sec1s. Was real hungry but still, we had to attend to the sec1s first >_>. So, I had to pangseh Zoe cause I didn't know we had to help out first, then can go for lunch. SORRY ZOE!

I had fun, pulling the sec1s to try out the instruments MUAHAHAHHAA :D I think the trumpeters rocks especially William and Kahyee. Cause they never give up on me although I kept pon band last time. No more! PROMISE. Have to thank William, cause he's always there for me. Helping me to print the scores and the warm up exercise book. Thank you. (:

After attending to the sec1s, proceeded to the hall to see performance and speeches. Band was the last. Everything was so perfect I think. Drama, choir, dance and obviously, band. :D muahaha.
Had to fast after dinner cause I had to go KK for a blood test for Idk what on Tues. Wasn't feeling that well .-. . Reached kk at about 10.30am. The doc was a malay and he's so rough T_T. The needle was soooo thick and long. Didn't dare to look at the long needle arg. I sat down there, closed my eyes and the doc just insert the needle into my flesh. PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay la, I did peep to be exact. Just a little. The doc "sucked" out 4 bottles of blood from me. Was on the verge of crying cause I was scared. The needle's even longer than the previous needles or the needle that the nurses used when I was in p5 having the p5/p6 injection loh. MUCH MORE THICKER ALSO!
Yes... Next is urine test. Have to pee inside a small bottle given by the nurses for idk what test also zz._.' okay I shall not elaborate further.. :x .

Went for lunch with mum. After lunch, was gonna go home. But walk till halfway hor, sueysuey my shoe spoil =_= Then I had to throw the shoes away since I couldn't walk properly also.. went bare footed there. Damn cold can ._.' Cause I was at kk, I don't think there got sell shoes loh, nearest place to buy also is the shopping centre @ novena right. I don't want to go Novena with my bare feet loh. So, tried my luck to see if there's any slippers at 7-11 HAHA. REALLY HAVE LEH. Lucky laa. But the slippers too big for me ._.' .. But nvm la, at least have shoe . :l so, bought it. home sweet home next. phew.

Went to school on wed, nothing much. went for band, practiced, very tired. Thurs too, went for band and VERY TIRED. T_T. Stayed back for class deco on Friday with Delanie and others :D Went to cwp to get our items and started to deco at about 2.30pm. Had fun :B . I did most of the stuffs behind wahahaha. Satisfied ^^ ! Love the christmas tree also hohoho. I cut one leh. :B I think Delanie very cute loh. I cut the tree wrongly, one of the edge gone. Then Delanie help me to "repair" by sticking some edge from the leftover green colour paper I've cut out. HAHAHA, Look freaking weird, but, hoho, we'll pass! :B

Had fun crapping and drawing the calender HAHAHAHA. I love E2'10-11 <3
Crapped all around the school afterwards, and home sweet home next. (:

Didn't attend band cause I was sick today. :/ SORRY T_t

-PS! HUGE MISTAKE.
CCA ORIENTATION WAS ON WED :x . monday was normal practice. ^^""" -10.33pm

Things are changing. The world is no longer the world you used to live in.. Getting more and more scary each passing day. You just have to depend on yourself and no one else. Friends leaving you, because they found their partners and yet you're all alone.. on your own because you don't trust love. You have people chasing after you, you don't give a damn about them nor trust them.. to open up your heart again. I understand your feelings now, senior. Almost losing everyone that you love.. I think I'm becoming more and more like you, huh? heh. Pretending that you're okay when you're not okay at all.

Life still goes on.. alone. with shits happening. Sigh. ._.'' I hate 2011.


Life's so different and weird. It's like, I don't enjoy doing the stuffs I enjoyed doing anymore. All the little stuffs, just fade away. Hope I'll be okay.

Probably meeting Gareth, Mark and the other random ns guy I met during countdown this year with Jing on Saturday. I hope, she doesn't go overboard with her words.

The only thing I'm looking forward to now, is my birthday, and cny celebrations back @ layang.

Don't you hate it when you hang out with others, and one of your best friend got angry and don't want to talk to you? I mean like, seriously la. Never hang out with your best friends doesn't mean they're not best friends okay. If all you do is hang out with your best friends, how about your normal friends? How to socialize when you only STICK to one best friend? I know you're talking about me la hor. It's like so obvious already please.

You see, I never hang out with Jing everytime also ma. We also have our lifes. We hang out with others too, but we're still best friends. I'm not comparing. I'm just disappointed. I don't even know what I did wrong and then you became so cold towards me ._.'' . When I talked to you you also just ignore or give me short answers unlike last time =_=' .. I'm not asking you to change. I'm just letting you know my pov and my feelings. (random)

I just had to post this! =D I LOVE YOU HUANG LJ! <3

When we're still pure... LOL. 

--

Classmates, 1D'2006. , 1C'MT'2006.
Classmates and bestfriends after 5years, S9'2009.
Bestfriends for 2years, and still counting! :D <3
ILYYYYY ^^ ~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Obviously, that's not all I have BWAHAHHAHA. I still have alot of pictures with you! >:] I'm just too lazy to upload them. ~o~)

You remind me of the song 'juicy pen' by Dj ozi HAHAHAHA. <3
Thanks for always being there for me, entertaining me with your noobness and cuteness*puke*, your horniness and stupidness. Thanks for tolerating me too :B LOVE YOU. ^^